path: root/docs/music/uncure-your-depression.md

# This Song Will Uncure Your Depression

2023-10-31

[Take Me To The Song](#tswuyd-final-export)

Download The Song (still haven't settled on which CC license)

- [.ogg, 2.6 MiB](https://fkfd.me/static/Frederick%20Yin%20-%20This%20Song%20Will%20Uncure%20Your%20Depression.ogg)
- [.wav, 16 bit, 48 kHz, 36.7 MiB](https://fkfd.me/static/Frederick%20Yin%20-%20This%20Song%20Will%20Uncure%20Your%20Depression.ogg)

## Motivation

I enrolled in a hip hop songwriting course and need something for the
final project. I also happened to participate in #looptober on <abbr
title="short for fediverse">fedi</abbr> for the first time.

On 2023-10-14, I came up with some beats, chords and a guitar solo,
despite me not able to play guitar irl:

<audio controls src="../img/uncure-your-depression/looptober-v1.ogg"></audio>

It was fire so i added a couple more things

<audio controls src="../img/uncure-your-depression/looptober-v2.ogg"></audio>

The sample you hear at the beginning is recorded by me as I landed at DTW,
Detroit, to begin my two years of study at UMich. I also added some pitch
bend to the guitar.

## Jamming Time

On 2023-10-17, I recorded a bassline for the solo. This version is
recorded at 0.5x and sped up because I invented the bassline literally 10
minutes ago. In the final product however I made it 1:1.

<audio controls src="../img/uncure-your-depression/solo-bassline.ogg"></audio>

There's also this distorted fuzzy guitar sound:

<audio controls src="../img/uncure-your-depression/fuzz-guitar.ogg"></audio>

Of course, this is no real guitar. It's actually my bass with effects in
[Guitarix](https://guitarix.org).

I am genuinely pleased by myself. It is the first thing I'm proud of since
the omurice I cooked on september 24.

At this point it's getting serious. I'm actually thinking about making
this a full song. Especially when my hip hop professor got sick and asked
us to submit something online, which seems like the perfect chance to
drain every joule of energy into this song. It's healthy I swear.

Long story short, this is the thing that came out of LMMS on 2023-10-27:

<audio controls src="../img/uncure-your-depression/lmms.ogg"></audio>

![LMMS editor window. 19 tracks in total.](img/uncure-your-depression/lmms-editor.png)

Meanwhile, I took some training to use a studio we have in the library.
I made a reservation on Saturday morning, 2023-10-28.

## Lyrics Time

It is Friday evening. I just realized I don't have the lyrics.

Prior to writing, I made several yes's and no's for myself.

- don't be passive aggressive.
- don't blame innocent people.
- don't overuse STEM metaphors.
- don't make people suicidal.
- do acknowledge your vulnerability.
- do make the lyrics genuine and relatable.
- do allow double takes and liberal interpretations.
- do misspell a word just to sound good.

What do I need? Well, four verses, one prechorus, one chorus, and one
bridge. (Spoiler: I couldn't come up with anything for the bridge.) Just
need to throw in eighth notes and triplets until they rhyme.

Did I stick to the rules? [Well…](#appendix-i-lyrics)

<audio id="tswuyd-final-export" controls src="../img/uncure-your-depression/tswuyd-20231031.ogg"></audio>

What you are listening to is the final product, produced on 2023-10-31.

I did:

- acknowledge my vulnerabilities
- make lyrics genuine
- misspell words
- use computer jargon once
- allow interpretations

Actually, seven lines were taken from my "museum of garbage". It's a note
on my phone. When my brain's garbage facility fabricates a sentence that
sounds like a lyric, I put it here.

However, it seems I have failed to not be passive aggressive. Everything
I wrote sounds negative. This is sadly very common in bands I drew
inspiration from, such as Linkin Park. I will try to make it more positive
next time.

## Studio Time

Ironically I missed the bus from my apartment to the library, so I had to
wait twenty minutes for the next one. Anyway, I got in the studio on time.
There is a Focusrite Scarlett interface, which had a whopping four inputs.
I only need one though. The mic is Shure SM-something, and it's not bad.
The Scarlett is plugged into the Mac on the desk and is not supposed to
rewired. I rewired it anyway.

I would like to thank PipeWire and people who do kernel stuff for handling
audio flawlessly. But amdgpu crashed twice.

The studio had the exact same headphones I use at home which is nice.

After a two hour session my throat hurts, but it's impressive I had enough
productivity to finish this.

## Bass Time

We're back from the studio! Heading back home to record bass. Although I'm
not good at using a pick, I did it anyway for the punch.

See [appendix](#appendix-iii-bass-tabs) for tabs and audio

## Mixing Time

I do not want to go into details because it's all guesswork. I *guess*
that's loud enough. I *guess* that's enough reverb. I do *not* enjoy
mixing audio. I had a version on 2023-10-28 which I *thought* could work,
but turned out too quiet. I had to use another whole bunch of compression
to get it as loud as possible while not raping your ears.

![Ardour editor window. There are 19 tracks total.](img/uncure-your-depression/ardour-editor.png)

## Album Art

![See description below](img/uncure-your-depression/album-cover.jpg)

The background is the glass wall of the Central Campus Transit Center bus
stop, the busiest place on campus. It was plastered with posters related
to Israel-Palestine days prior, then scrubbed, leaving heavy residue.
I took this picture on my way back from the studio. Incidentally, I saw
the first election poster this year, on the back of the wall (not
pictured). I feel this photo captures the theme of the song.

## Reflections

I like this song as a concept. I really put my musicussy into it, and it's
as good as I can possibly achieve.

I would rate the music 4 stars out of 5. The guitar solo is obviously the
single best thing throughout, but the bass and drums are just as good.
Some room for improvement:

- More spicy chords
- Variable tempo
- Time changes
- The bridge sounds out of place

Lyrically, I would rate it 3.5 stars. While I will not reveal the intended
meaning, it reflects a period of cultural shock and unease as I adapt to
a new environment. As said earlier I have fallen into the "rant about
everything" trap, completely neglecting the positives in life. However one
thing's for sure: I have surpassed Green Day's latest single, ["The
American Dream Is Killing Me"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t1TDvy7djJg).

Vocal is not my forte, so I'm not gonna be overcritical of myself.
However, in my next song I could work on putting more emotion into the
rapping.

## Appendix I. Lyrics

[Verse 1]  
Due to unfortunate circumstances, I'm in Detroit  
Fourteen hours in the air my legs don't feel great  
The violent vibration is worsening my condition  
There's no way I'm already out of UTC+8  
  
[Verse 2]  
I never ask for help, the things under my belt  
The shame when I depend, the pride let me do it again  
But when I close my eyes, when I cuddle my blåhaj  
I wish it was someone, someone make me warm inside  
  
[Prechorus]  
Why am I not getting what I deserve?  
You said the grades won't be on a curve  
Look at my algo it's big O(no)  
Well in fact never mind now I see why  
I'd rather spend a night with Turing  
Than the silicon I'm abusing  
And the patience I'm losing  
Shut it down, you see we're cruising  
  
[Chorus]  
Will you be  
At the party after another divide?  
I can't afford  
The dawn's early light, oh yeah  
  
[Verse 3]  
I woke up late and I missed the bus (fuck)  
I guess that just what happens when you don't have a car  
The more I learned, the harder it become  
Your self esteem-ate only goes so far  
  
[Verse 4]  
I'm walking (I'm walking)  
I'm walking by the willow trees and watching (I'm watching)  
Watching out for the stupid geese  
Und ich kann davon erzählen, wie die Schmerzen fangen an  
因为我在太平洋另一面三万三刀学费的地方辗转流浪  
  
[Prechorus]  
  
[Chorus]  
  
[Bridge (Instrumental)]  
  
[Chorus]  

## Appendix II. Chord progression

[Intro, Verses]  
Am G Am Dm (6x)  
  
[Prechorus]  
Am G Em Am Bdim  
Am G Em F  
  
[Chorus]  
Am G Am Dm  
Am G C Am  
  
[Solo]  
Am C Bdim Am  
C Dm Am Bdim  
  
[Bridge]  
Am C Bdim Am  
C Dm Am Am  
Am C Bdim Am  
C Dm Am Esus4  

(I'm not actually sure. I kinda butchered around)
  
[Outro]  
Am C Bdim Am  
C Dm Am C

## Appendix III. Bass tabs

[Chorus 1]

<audio controls src="../img/uncure-your-depression/bass-chorus1.ogg"></audio>

```
G --------|--------|--------|--------|--------|--------|--------|--------|
D --------|--------|--------|0-0---0-|--------|--------|--------|--------|
A 0---0--0|--------|0---0--0|--------|0---0--0|--------|3---3--3|0-0-----|
E --------|3-3---3-|--------|--------|--------|3-3---3-|--------|--------|
```

[Chorus 2 & 3] (first seven bars are the same as 1)

<audio controls src="../img/uncure-your-depression/bass-chorus2.ogg"></audio>

```
  8
G |--------|
D |2-0-----|
A |----3-0-|
E |--------|
```

[Solo]

<audio controls src="../img/uncure-your-depression/bass-solo.ogg"></audio>

```
G --------|--------|--------|--------|--------|--------|--------|--------|
D --------|--------|----0033|22220---|--------|--------|--------|--------|
A 0000----|--------|--22----|-----330|00000000|22222233|--------|--------|
E ----0-00|001-3333|11------|--------|--------|--------|0000000 |111 1---|
                                                            \3_/ \3_/
```

## Appendix IV. Musical influences

Lyrics mostly inspired by Linkin Park, Bill Wurtz and twenty one pilots

"The dawn's early light" line came up while singing Green Day's "21st
Century Breakdown" in the shower

Rapping style inspired by Linkin Park and twenty one pilots

Guitar solo at 2:50 unintendedly sounds like "Thank You For The Venom" by
My Chemical Romance

## Appendix V. Tools Used

### Software

- [LMMS](https://lmms.io): synth instruments
- [Ardour](https://ardour.org): recording and production
- [Guitarix](https://guitarix.org/): virtual amp
- [Krita](https://krita.org/): album cover

### Hardware (Studio)

- Focusrite Scarlett 18i8
- Shure SM-48
- Audio-Technica ATH-M20x

### Hardware (Home)

- Behringer UMC22
- Squier Affinity PJ bass
- Audio-Technica ATH-M20x