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| -rw-r--r-- | docs/furry/mosfet-an-interview.md | 59 |
2 files changed, 32 insertions, 27 deletions
diff --git a/docs/furry/img/mosfet-an-interview/rix-poster.jpg b/docs/furry/img/mosfet-an-interview/rix-poster.jpg Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..ebfd5ea --- /dev/null +++ b/docs/furry/img/mosfet-an-interview/rix-poster.jpg diff --git a/docs/furry/mosfet-an-interview.md b/docs/furry/mosfet-an-interview.md index a95b8d8..f47cf45 100644 --- a/docs/furry/mosfet-an-interview.md +++ b/docs/furry/mosfet-an-interview.md @@ -1,6 +1,6 @@ # Mosfet: An Interview -2024-09-08 +2024-09-09 > Per responsible blogging practices, I am obligated to tell you that this > is not an actual interview that happened. But for the following five @@ -77,36 +77,41 @@ Would you like to share your story? A. It wasn't my decision. It was entirely Rix's fault. -Q. Would you care to elaborate? +(Clears throat) The story begins in August. I was chilling in Duderstadt, +first floor collab area, doing human things. Then I noticed a poster on +the wall. -A. OK, you know Duderstadt? The North Campus library thing. It was August, -completely normal day. I was chilling on a table between the design labs, -doing human things. + -Then I noticed a poster on the wall. I was like "holy \*\*\*\* no way -that's a furry" and took a closer look. You bet your sweet \*\*\* it was -Rix's \*\*\*\*\*\* head. It says "I want YOU for the furry club" because -Americans are extremely creative. But things were not so simple. It was -apparently a carefully orchestrated plan to make me furry, and by looking -at the poster, I've fallen right in their trap. +(Editor's note: we searched through Frederick's camera while he was in the +bathroom and found the poster he was talking about) -The furries have mastered telepathic mind control. In the next few days, -Rix's curse took a grip hold of my life. I could not stop thinking about -furries: on the bus, in the classroom, even in bed, like there was no past -nor future, only the present in an eternity of furries. He hath me -enchanted, ye gods, he hath me possessed! +I was like "holy \*\*\*\* no \*\*\*\*\*\*\* way that's a furry!!1!" As +I stepped closer, Rix's menacing stare penetrated into my soul. The slogan +goes, "I want YOU for the furry club", because you can always count on +Americans to come up with creative slogans after the WWI. -On Wednesday, I lost all control of my body — I was like a puppet under -his manipulation, all my bones and muscles — they took me on a Commuter -South, which drove me to Festifall, where they showed their true forms on -booth A24. +Nevertheless, it worked. It was apparently a carefully orchestrated scheme +of mind control to make me furry, and with just a glimpse at the poster, +I've fallen right in their trap. -Under mind control, I struck a conversation and asked for a photo with -Rix. He bit me in the neck, 'tis but a sting; little did I know that he -has rabies, good heavens! I figure he must've given me furriotoxin, and -that's how I became furry. +In the next few days, Rix's curse took a grip hold of my life. I could not +stop thinking about furries: on the bus, in the classroom, even in bed; +into their paws I have commended my spirit. -Q. That's such a wonderful story, but what's furriotoxin? +It was Wednesday when I lost all control of my body — I was a puppet, all +my bones and muscles held hostage by the furries — they pushed me aboard +a wicked wagon, the so-called Kommuter Sauth — it drove me to the +Zentralercampustransitszentrum, not far from which Festifall was held. + +I recognized him in an instant — he was more fluffy than the poster had +shown, and extremely cute — but the sweetest snout has the sharpest tooth, +for he hath rabies! He bit me right in my neck — next thing I knew, +I became a furry, for the furriotoxin has infiltrated my bloodstream. + +Q. Wait, what's furriotoxin? A. It's a toxin that makes you furry. Have you watched zombie movies? It's like that. There is no cure. @@ -181,10 +186,10 @@ A. Salmon, heavy metal, cuddles. Q. Three things he hates? -A. Cilantro, roller coasters, gym class. +A. Sparkling water, roller coasters, gym class. Q. His favorite band? -❚ + A. System Of A Down. Q. That tracks. Next question: Did you watch _Zootopia_? |
