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-rw-r--r-- | docs/shitpost/fake_moon_landing.md | 19 | ||||
-rw-r--r-- | docs/shitpost/haiku.md | 41 | ||||
-rw-r--r-- | docs/shitpost/index.md | 10 | ||||
-rw-r--r-- | docs/shitpost/rousseau_and_schopenhauer.md | 22 |
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diff --git a/docs/shitpost/fake_moon_landing.md b/docs/shitpost/fake_moon_landing.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..044d8c1 --- /dev/null +++ b/docs/shitpost/fake_moon_landing.md @@ -0,0 +1,19 @@ +# Debunking the "fake moon landing" conspiracy theory + +2021-01-18 + +Some people think that what Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin did in 1969 was +a "fake moon landing". However, there's no way this is true. The moon, as +we see at night, is actually a spherical lump of rock. It looks small only +because it's far away from us. In fact, it is 1737km in radius and +7.342e19t in mass, both much larger and heavier than anything humans +have made. Despite the United States' unsurpassable power in engineering +amidst the Cold War, it was impossible for NASA to build a fake moon +identical to the real one in dimension, let alone quietly propel it into +the orbit where the latter belongs without the Soviet Union noticing. They +would only have a few hours' window in which to perform the manipulations, +before the sun sets in USSR. This is as practical as trying to escape an +earthquake on a segway. Therefore, what the pioneers landed on fifty +years ago was *the* real moon, not a fake one. + +Thank you for coming to my TED talk. diff --git a/docs/shitpost/haiku.md b/docs/shitpost/haiku.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..c6ffd1e --- /dev/null +++ b/docs/shitpost/haiku.md @@ -0,0 +1,41 @@ +# Haiku collection + +This is a collection of haiku I composed on February 19, 2020, published on mastodon.technology. See [thread](https://mastodon.technology/@fakefred/103683337253008138). + +## Printer + +Background: my inkjet jammed up. + +>I do not have the +Slightest fucking intention +To fix that printer + +## Arch in a Nutshell + +This one is my favorite. `-Syu` is pronounced "S Y U". + +> What goes wrong if I +`sudo pacman -Syu`? +Google "Arch rollback" + +## Python + +``` +#!/usr/bin/python +# what if it gets self-aware? +raise SystemExit +``` + +How to read: + +- `#!/usr/bin/python`: "user bin python" +- `#` is silenced + +## Paccache + +This is a real story. + +> `$ sudo paccache -r` +20 gigas freed from disk +very delighted + diff --git a/docs/shitpost/index.md b/docs/shitpost/index.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..fa0a6f0 --- /dev/null +++ b/docs/shitpost/index.md @@ -0,0 +1,10 @@ +# Shitposts + +Based on the fact you're looking at my shitposts and not anything of +value, I know you are very bored. You may attempt but miserably fail to +entertain yourself with one or more of the following shitposts in the +precious time you could've spent more wisely elsewhere: + +- [Debunking the "fake moon landing" conspiracy theory](fake_moon_landing) +- [Haiku collection](haiku) +- [Rousseau and Schopenhauer walk into a bar](rousseau_and_schopenhauer) diff --git a/docs/shitpost/rousseau_and_schopenhauer.md b/docs/shitpost/rousseau_and_schopenhauer.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..0003518 --- /dev/null +++ b/docs/shitpost/rousseau_and_schopenhauer.md @@ -0,0 +1,22 @@ +# Rousseau and Schopenhauer walk into a bar + +2020-10-02 + +Rousseau and Schopenhauer walk into a bar. Both order a whiskey. “Say +Rousseau,” the tender asks, “how’s your kids doin’ in the orphanage?” + +Rousseau gets mad, says, “I had no choice back then! How else could I have +time to develop my theories in child education?” + +“Hey Schopenhauer,” the tender leans to him and asks, “heard ya hooked up +some hot whore last night, huh?” + +Schopenhauer gets mad, says, “I’m still a virgin, man! That can’t even be +called sex. I had to pull it out halfway to meet the deadline. Spent the +rest of the night finishing Thirty Reasons Why Women Suck.” + +Rousseau happens to finish his whiskey, slams his glass on the counter, +turns to the bartender. “Why you prick keep judgin’ us?” + +“Naaaah”, the tender shrugs and says, “I’m totally not disrespecting you +philosophers! I justlike to taunt them from time to time.” |